When my husband and I were first married, every Saturday when I woke up before him, I would giddily sneak out of bed and start cooking all of his favorite things for breakfast - eggs, bacon, hash browns, coffee...the whole nine-yards. I would very neatly display it on an elaborate plate and tip-toe back into the bedroom waiting in anticipation for the surprise and excitement on his face. And every Saturday he would wake up to the smell of my labor-filled breakfast and say, “oh thank you baby, that was sweet,” in a flat tone that would deflate all of my preconceived notions on how I thought he should react.
The things is, it wasn't that my husband wasn't appreciative and excited about what I had done for him. He just didn't react the way I had wanted him to! And that's because we have different love languages, or differing ways we feel most loved and appreciated. For a strong and steady relationship, it's important to understand your love language, your partner's love language, and how you can work together to give and get the love you need.
What are "love languages"?
Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a popular book back in 1992 called, The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate, which outlines five different ways romantic partners express and experience love.